Rant: You Ruined Mike Myers, Love Guru Is Your Fault

"Hey! Come in here! Yes, you and your sister. Pause Entourage and come in here for a minute. We need to talk. No, it can’t wait. We have Tivo for a reason. Just hit the pause button and sit down. Your mother and I are concerned about your behavior lately. Yes, we did find the condoms in your old cell phone drawer and your thug life brother’s little cache of marijuana behind his old skateboards. You don’t need to explain. Whoring yourself out to the popular older boys is an integral part of being a sophomore in high school and experimenting with marginally harmful, mood-altering plants is how one finds himself before college. That’s not the problem. "

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